


More Than Words, Part Nine

by Candy_A



Series: More Than Words [9]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-25
Updated: 2015-05-25
Packaged: 2018-04-01 06:20:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4009099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Candy_A/pseuds/Candy_A
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the final chapter of this series, Danny continues to cope with the aftermath of his ordeal and its impact on his relationship with Steve, and the guys celebrate a milestone in their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	More Than Words, Part Nine

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry this was slow being posted! Been out of town. This is the ninth and final chapter of the series. Please note this work is not authorized for archiving on any site other than AO3 or the author's website (or links from LJ).

Steve stirred and instinctively reached for Danny, but his hand encountered empty space. He opened his eyes and turned over to find himself alone. Concerned, he got up and glanced in the bathroom, but Danny wasn't there. He headed out to the living room and wasn't really surprised to see Danny curled up on the couch, the TV on.   
  
"Hey," he said, sitting on the coffee table. Grace was spending a couple weeks with Stan and Rachel, so they were alone at Steve's place. Honestly, Steve had been a little disappointed when they got home from the jewelry store and nothing happened. He was always careful to read Danny's signals, to not push him for sex if he didn't seem interested in it or in the mood. He'd been through something so brutal and traumatic that the last thing Steve wanted to do was push him if he was having a bad day or just didn't want to be touched that way.   
  
"Sorry if the TV woke you up."  
  
"Can't sleep?" Steve asked, concerned. Danny almost never slept on the couch anymore, even if he was restless. More often than not, Danny could sleep at least part of the night when he was with Steve, and if he couldn't, Steve had learned to tune out the TV in the bedroom enough to catnap when Danny needed it on.   
  
"Don't want to."  
  
"You haven't had a nightmare in a week or so, buddy. That's a good sign."  
  
"Yeah. Sign that it's about time for one."  
  
"Is that what you're worried about? Having a nightmare?"  
  
"Partly."  
  
"What's the other part?"  
  
"I'm all healed up. You know.  _There."_  
  
"I know. It's really good to have you back at full speed, partner. Feeling good again."  
  
"But I'm not at full speed or we'd be having sex."  
  
"We do have sex."  
  
"Not... _sex...sex."_  
  
"Penetration."  
  
"Yeah, that's usually part of the package."  
  
"So? I'm not exactly suffering here, Danno."  
  
"You don't want to fuck me?"  
  
"No, Danny, I don't want to  _'fuck'_ you. I wanna make love to you any way I can and when you're comfortable with it and want it, if you ever feel that way, I want to make love to you that way. And if you never are, we'll enjoy all the other things we can do. Which are pretty damn good, pal."  
  
"You can't be that casual about it."  
  
"What about you? You haven't done it to me yet."  
  
"Don't you get it? I just...I think about you doing it to me or me doing it to you and..."  
  
"You know, Danny, I haven't been sitting with a stopwatch timing you. Just because you're physically healed doesn't mean you just forget what happened to you."  
  
"I can't forget it, Steve. It's there all the time. It's there in the morning and it's there at night and it's there when we're making love and things should just move in the natural progression they should and..." Danny sat up and ran his hands over his face. Steve sat next to him.   
  
"Would a back rub help you sleep? We can turn on the TV in the bedroom."  
  
"What about...?"  
  
"We're not gonna solve that tonight, sweetheart." Steve put his arm around Danny and kissed his cheek. Steve was glad the little gesture made Danny smile. "So let's settle for something we can make better. Besides, I've kind of gotten used to you being in bed with me. Don't like it that much by myself anymore."  
  
"Why do you want me, anyway? You could have anybody you wanted, and they'd be normal."  
  
"They wouldn't be you. End of discussion. You're my missing piece, Danno."  
  
"It's just a bad night," Danny said, his voice breaking. Steve held him, tucking Danny's head under his chin, just letting him cry it out. Steve didn't say anything, he just kept Danny close and rubbed his back gently until he finally went limp against Steve. Steve covered Danny's back with the throw.   
  
“I’m so tired.”  
  
“Try to get some rest. I’m right here.”  
  
“I don’t mean that way. I just...I’m so tired of trying to look like I’m okay and I feel like a fucking train wreck.”  
  
“It’s hard when most people don’t know what really happened in Colombia. It puts a lot of stress on you to keep up appearances.”  
  
“It would be worse if they knew. I couldn’t stand it if everybody looked at me and pictured  _that_  happening to me.”  
  
“Would it help to go see your family? Maybe let them know what you’re going through?”  
  
“It would kill my mom. After Matty...” He was quiet a moment. “And I could never look my dad in the eye again if I told him that.”  
  
“Your dad seems like a good guy. I don’t think he’d blame you for that. Might be mad as hell and want to kill every motherfucker who touched you the wrong way, but I can’t see him being mad at you or thinking less of you.”  
  
“It would kill me if Grace ever found out.”  
  
“You’re a survivor, Danny. She’d be proud of that, just like I am. Do you want to see somebody? Go to counseling?”  
  
“I just need to talk about it sometimes. Not to a stranger. Sometimes I’m just...not okay, Steve.”  
  
“I know. What’s the big thing that’s keeping you up tonight?”  
  
“That I couldn’t be tougher. Couldn’t take it better. That they made me cry and beg and...and if they’d heard me...I’m just glad they didn’t hear me say your name or figure out what I was saying.”  
  
“You should have just been able to take torture in silence? Let me tell you something. I wasn’t really happy to react to all the crazy shit Wo Fat did to me, either, but sometimes you just can’t help it. The pain hits you and you can’t stop it.” Steve sighed, stroking Danny’s hair, resting his cheek against it. “Torture is as humiliating as it is painful. It’s just one big degradation. I haven’t been tortured that way, but I’ve been through enough to know that there’s a point at which you just can’t put on the tough guy act as much as you want to. Your body and your brain just do their own thing and take you along for the ride.”  
  
“Rub my back for a while, will ya? That felt really good.”  
  
“You got it, sweetheart.” Steve was relieved to do something for Danny that made him feel better, even if he couldn’t fix the larger problem. “I love you.”  
  
“Don’t give up on me, okay? I’m trying. I know it probably doesn’t seem like it, but I’m trying.”  
  
“I know how hard you're trying, Danno. I’m never giving up on you and I’m never leaving you.”   
  
“I love you, Steven.”  
  
"Go to sleep, baby. I've got you. If you start dreaming, I'll wake you. I promise," he said, kissing Danny's temple.  
  
"Promise?" Danny mumbled, and he sounded as if he were almost asleep.  
  
"Promise. Hold onto me. I won't let go." And Steve didn't. He kept watch over Danny as he slept, determined to keep him safe, even from his dreams.  
  
********  
  
"But you have to have a wedding," Grace protested as they sat around the dinner table at Steve's. They were mostly moved in there now, with just a few remaining items to bring over from Danny's place. It wasn't easy to get the three of them around the table for dinner most nights, but Steve and Danny were determined to make the effort as often as they could so Grace had as normal a family experience as they could provide, even with their offbeat schedules.  
  
"We would, it would just be small," Steve said.  
  
"Going to the courthouse isn't a wedding," she said.  
  
"It's still a wedding, Gracie. Just not a big party. Uncle Steve and I made promises to each other, and to go do it again...it's like that didn't count," Danny said.  
  
"You're not gonna win this one, Danno," Steve said, carving off a piece of his steak and putting it in his mouth. He paused when he noticed Grace was staring at him.   
  
"That much red meat isn't good for your heart," she said.   
  
Danny found the whole thing a bit amusing, but he didn't have much to say, since he had a similar slab of meat on his own plate. Grace was eating the salad portion of the meal, enhanced with some grilled chicken she'd cut up and added to it.   
  
"I'll run an extra mile in the morning, Sergeant," he teased her, and she smiled.   
  
"I just want you to live to be old, that's all," she said.   
  
"As long as you and Danno are around, I'll stick around. I don't want to miss anything," he said, and she laughed. "What if we have a nice dinner party after we go get our license?"   
  
"It's not the same as a  _wedding."_  
  
"We didn't do the traditional vows, Steve. We could do those," Danny suggested. Steve knew the moment Grace expressed any disappointment over them not having a wedding, a wedding would be in the works.   
  
"I'll marry you as many times as it takes, Danno," Steve said, taking his hand.   
  
"Love you, too, babe," Danny replied, smiling, leaning toward him for a kiss. When they parted, Grace was watching them with a big grin.   
  
********  
  
“You’re up early, even for you,” Danny said as he joined Steve, who was seated in one of the two chairs closest to the beach. “I brought coffee.”  
  
“I knew I fell in love with you for some reason,” Steve said, taking the mug Danny handed him before he sat down.   
  
“I figured you’d be swimming to the mainland and back or something, but then I saw you in the chair and figured I’d come out and join you.” Danny took a drink of his coffee and watched Steve’s profile as he stared out at the ocean.  
  
“When Wo Fat had me drugged off my ass, I imagined sitting out here, having a beer with my dad, just talking.”  
  
“You never told me much about your dreams about your dad.”  
  
“There’s not a lot to tell. I came home, he was still alive...” Steve was quiet a few seconds. “We had the kind of relationship I wish we’d really had.”  
  
“If you’d been around more, not had to be away so much, don’t you think it would have been different?” Danny asked.  
  
“Maybe.”  
  
“Today kind of sucks, doesn’t it?” Danny knew it was Mother’s Day. He wasn’t sure how he’d handle that day himself when he couldn’t at least pick up the phone and call his mother, couldn’t pick out a card for her and send her flowers. And there was Steve who’d been without a mother most of his life, then had her drift in and out of his life, and now she was dead and he was sitting there staring at the ocean on Mother’s Day with nobody to send anything to.  
  
“Yeah, it does.”  
  
“Get on the phone with me later when I call my mom. She’ll like that.”  
  
“She’s a sweet lady,” Steve said, smiling. “This feels like part of Wo Fat’s trick. Like I’m reliving my mother’s death again.”  
  
“It’s bad enough to live through losing someone you love once. But to have to do it twice? That’s brutal, babe, and you don’t deserve it.”  
  
“It feels like I lost both parents again this year,” he said, then he cleared his throat, blinking. Danny knew he was fighting back tears, but he let him have his composure without chipping away at it. Just yet.   
  
“You did. You thought your dad was alive. It’s just as bad as if he was and then you lost him again.”  
  
“I guess I’m just getting old and soft, because it’s just...it feels...” He pressed his knuckles against his mouth and it was obvious he was losing the battle with holding it all in. Danny got up and went to sit on the arm of Steve’s chair and put his arms around Steve.   
  
“It’s just us out here. And a few seagulls that are disappointed I didn’t bring breakfast,” he added, and Steve let out a watery laugh. He leaned against Danny and let himself have a few moments of unguarded tears while Danny held him and stroked his hair. Then he seemed to feel almost worse, and more tears came. “It’s okay, babe. I’ve got you.”  
  
“If I lost you...”  
  
“You won’t.” Danny had a feeling what was bothering Steve. They still had about a month to wait for Danny’s final HIV test, and while testing positive was in no way a death sentence or even a guarantee of developing AIDS, it was certainly a heightened risk that the worst could happen prematurely. “We’re gonna be sitting out here when we’re so old that the wood chairs bother our arthritis.”  
  
“Promise?”  
  
“Yeah, I promise.”  
  
“I’m gonna hold you to that.”  
  
“That’s okay. I don’t make promises I’m not gonna keep.”  _Even if I die before you, I’ll be right here by your side until you come join me. I’ll sit here and hold you like this when you’re lonely and make you feel my love across whatever’s between us because no barrier is gonna keep me away from haunting you, babe._  “Hey, you’re starting to sound like me, worrying about the worst thing that could happen and probably won’t.”  
  
“You’re rubbing off on me.”  
  
“Not yet, but it sounds like a hell of an idea.” He smiled when Steve laughed at that. What he said next shocked him, but it flowed so easily and seemed so right that he took the chance to follow the thought and say the words. “Let’s go inside and make love. I mean...really make love.”  
  
“You sure?” Steve backed away enough to look Danny in the eyes.  
  
“No, but I want to. If you think it’s safe.”  
  
“Yeah, it’s safe with protection. If you don’t like what’s happening, we’ll stop.”  
  
“And find something else to do naked and horizontal,” Danny added. “We’ve got the house to ourselves, so we don’t have to be quiet,” he said, grinning. Grace was with Rachel for Mother’s Day and the following week, so there were no restrictions on their activities for a while.   
  
"You don't have to ask twice, Danno," Steve said, standing, holding out his hand until Danny slid his into it and they walked hand in hand back up to the house. When they reached the bedroom, Steve opened the dresser drawer and took out a small MP3 player and plugged it in to a speaker.  
  
"What's that?" Danny asked, smiling, confused.  
  
"You'll see." Steve paused. "Maybe you'll think it's corny."  
  
"Depends on what it is," he said, sliding his arms around Steve from behind, resting his head on Steve's back while he finished his preparations with the little device. A moment later, soft music was coming from the little speaker. It was an old love song,  _The Look of Love,_  but it was hopelessly romantic.   
  
"Dance with me," Steve said, turning, taking Danny in his arms.   
  
"It's not corny, Steven," Danny said, letting Steve hold him, position them so he was holding Danny's hand, leading their slow dance.   
  
 _I can hardly wait to hold you_  
 _Feel my arms around you_  
 _How long I have waited_  
 _Waited just to love you_  
 _Now that I have found you_  
 _Don't ever go..._  
  
"I love you, Danny," he whispered in Danny's ear, swaying them to the music, another song following the first.   
  
"Love you, too, babe," he said, finding he had a lump in his throat. He'd barely remembered to answer him. He was letting himself get lost in the romance of the moment, loving Steve more than he thought he could because he knew what he was doing. He knew under the best circumstances, Danny was going to be scared of this the first time it happened after what he'd been through, and he was slowing them down, getting the focus off the physical and onto the romance and the emotions behind it.   
  
Danny closed his eyes and kept his head on Steve's shoulder, letting himself feel safe and sheltered and loved, swept away by the romance of Steve's little music player and its speaker, by the fact he'd thought about it and put songs on it and cared so much about how Danny felt, about making him feel safe enough to do this...  
  
With the soft music in the background, Danny touched Steve's cheek and kissed him, ready to move forward with things a bit. He felt loved and treasured, and this was the one person who, even in his worst nightmares, was his safe haven, the one who showed up somehow and made the pain stop. There didn't seem to be a reason to fear anything with Steve, and he gave himself over to their kisses, to the slow, gentle discarding of clothing and the press of skin against skin.   
  
 _I'll love you til the blue bells forget to bloom_  
 _I'll love you til the clover has lost its perfume_  
 _I'll love you til the poets run out of rhyme_  
 _Until the twelfth of never_  
 _And that's a long, long time..._  
  
Steve eased them back toward the bed and carefully urged Danny down on the mattress, on his back, while he covered him with his own body, resuming their kisses and caresses. Steve was kissing his chin, his neck, his shoulders, lips and tongue lingering on his skin, experiencing him, tasting him, pausing to suck his nipples, making him moan and try to arch into that talented mouth.   
  
He touched Steve's head, let his fingers run through his hair, wanting him up higher and down lower at the same time, wanting to kiss his mouth but not wanting to stop him from what he was doing.   
  
 _I believe in you_  
 _You know the door to my very soul_  
 _You're the light in my deepest darkest hour_  
 _You're my savior when I fall_  
  
Danny was getting hard, frustrated when Steve didn't use that gifted mouth of his to make him come. He seemed intent on kissing every part of Danny, loving all of him, and Danny figured a blow job would bring things to an end when all of this was just a beginning.   
  
Steve was kissing the insides of his thighs, moving lower until he made Danny gasp and grab a handful of the sheet when he licked and sucked on the tender skin behind his balls. Danny didn't expect him to do what he did next. He should have, but it was as if he didn't dare hope that's what Steve would do for him.   
  
He felt Steve's tongue very carefully probing the outer edge of his center, not teasing him, really, but very gradually building up to penetrating him even with his tongue. Steve hadn't even suggested he turn on his stomach, and Danny was grateful for that, because he didn't think he could do this face down. He had to be present, in the here and now, with the morning sun coming through the windows and watching Steve's muscles move gracefully and the intensity of his concentration on what he was doing, as if making love to Danny was the most important mission of his life.   
  
"Is this okay, sweetheart?" he asked, kissing Danny's thigh, waiting for his answer.  
  
"It's amazing, babe," Danny said, wanting to feel Steve's tongue, his lips...something gentle and intimate and...worshipful to that part of his body that had suffered such abuse, and that was still the focus of his fear.   
  
Now Steve was making love to him with his mouth, and he didn't think Danny was dirty or damaged or used. And it felt good to be loved there. He moaned, his head back on the pillow, unable to remember anyone ever doing that to him before. Then Steve moved back a bit and put some lube on his finger. Danny tried not to find that frightening, but no matter how good it had been up to now, he was still afraid of that moment when all the gentleness and good feelings would suddenly change to pain.   
  
Steve must have felt him tense up, because he moved up and kissed Danny, settling next to him and holding him, nuzzling him.   
  
"I love you, Danny. I'd rather die than hurt you, okay?"  
  
"I know. I don't want to be scared."  
  
"It's okay. Can I try just a little with my finger?"  
  
"Yeah, okay," Danny agreed, but it felt like jumping off a cliff.   
  
"We can wait, baby. It's okay if you don't want to do this now."  
  
"I do and I don't," Danny admitted. Steve kissed him then and pulled him into his arms, holding him close.   
  
"We'll wait until the 'I do' outweighs the 'I don't', okay?"  
  
"It kind of does now. I'm just..."  
  
"I know." Steve kissed him again, then moved down a bit and rubbed his finger gently over Danny's opening. He slowly eased just the tip of his finger inside, and despite his initial start at the sensation, Danny was able to relax. It didn't hurt, and Steve had infinite patience easing just that one finger into him. "Love touching you, baby," he said, stretching Danny a little more now, moving his finger carefully inside him. "You ready for me to try a little more?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah, I think so," Danny replied, letting out a long breath. He was more relaxed now, but when he felt himself stretching to accommodate two fingers, he tensed up again. He felt full, and next would come the awful pain...  
  
"Talk to me, Danno."  
  
"It feels full...stretched...like it's gonna start hurting."  
  
"Do you want me to stop, sweetheart? It's okay if you do."  
  
Those words helped, not to mention the gentle way they were said.   
  
"Just go slow."  
  
"Always, baby. No rush." Steve's voice calmed him. This was Steve after all, and Danny was in control - Steve wanted him to feel good, and feel safe. He could stop all of it with a word.   
  
The less nervous Danny was, the easier it was for Steve to stretch him and get him ready. Steve's fingers were moving in and out of him with ease now, with lots of patience and a lot of lube.   
  
Steve got himself ready with the condom and more lube. He looked around for a moment before finding a pillow and easing it under Danny's hips so he wasn't working as hard to hold his lower back up. With Danny's legs parted and his knees back a bit, Steve began easing carefully inside him. Danny worked hard to relax, which seemed like a contradiction in itself, but as he felt Steve entering him, it was nothing like the awful experience he'd had in Colombia. Soft music was playing, they were in their bed, and even though Danny felt his muscles straining to accommodate Steve, it wasn't painful exactly, just an incredibly full feeling. Most of his fear came from expecting pain and waiting for it to happen than actually being in pain.   
  
He wrapped his legs around Steve's hips and for once was glad Steve was taller, because he could do what he was doing and still reach Danny to kiss him and hold him and whisper in his ear. And he did just that, distracting Danny with kisses and nibbles along his jaw and his neck, holding him and giving him all the love words that would completely destroy anyone's perception that Steve wasn't good with romance or expressing himself.   
  
Somewhere along the way, they began moving in unison with each other, gentle but firm strokes that had Steve sweating and moaning and mumbling Danny's name against his neck, and made Danny gasp and cry out Steve's name in pleasure, feeling the fear leave him as his body felt good sensations and his heart and soul felt happy and at peace for the first time since he'd suffered the ordeal that had left him so afraid to be touched this way.  
  
When they were done, they lay there tangled in each other's arms, still breathing hard. Steve was still kissing his forehead and his cheek, since they were easiest to reach and Danny wasn't letting go of him anytime soon.   
  
"Danny...God, you're amazing, baby," he said, making the effort to tilt Danny's chin up so he could kiss him properly. "Are you okay?"  
  
"Yeah, a little more than okay," Danny said, and he couldn't believe a little laugh escaped him, but he was glad it did, because it made Steve laugh, too. "I love you, Steven. I'm real glad you're mine."  
  
"I have been for a long time," he said, holding Danny close, kissing his shoulder. "Nap?"  
  
"Nap," Danny agreed through a yawn, nestling against Steve, falling into a dreamless sleep where even his demons were, for once, put to rest.  
  
********  
  
Steve could feel Danny's warm breath on his cheek and feel the rise and fall of his breathing where his arm was around him as they lay so close to each other they were sharing a pillow. He opened his eyes and smiled, watching Danny's sleeping face. In the unguarded state of sleep, Danny looked serene and...younger than he did when he was awake. Sleep was a hard won state for Danny, but when he achieved it, it smoothed out the intensity and the stress that were so often etched on his features. Then a smile spread across Danny's face before he opened his eyes. Steve kissed the end of his nose.   
  
"Morning. Again."  
  
"Morning," Danny replied. "You got that look."  
  
"It's a face, huh?" Steve said, kissing Danny's lips this time.  
  
"It's your 'I got some' look."  
  
"Try again," Steve said, kissing him again. "It's my 'I had the best there is' look."  
  
"I think you missed your calling. Should have been diplomatic relations."  
  
"If these are diplomatic relations, sign me up," Steve said, pulling Danny even closer and kissing him deeply, with lots of tongue. He ran his hands over Danny's back, one of them sliding down the curve of his back to his ass, then over his hip and down his thigh. "Everything okay?"  
  
"Yeah, real good," Danny said, kissing back, his hand exploring until it reached Steve's ass. "No pain," he added, his voice barely a whisper.  
  
"I never want you to be in pain because of me."  
  
"I'm not. I wasn't." Danny touched Steve's cheek and looked into his eyes. "You wouldn't do that to me."  
  
"Never," Steve said, catching his hand, kissing it. "How big a wedding do you think we need to have to make Grace happy?"  
  
"To make her  _happy?_  About 300 guests, a band, a professionally catered reception, fancy suits, formal dresses, flowers  _everywhere..._  To pass her inspection? A party on the beach with our friends where we say vows and exchange rings, and she can be our maid of honor and wear flowers in her hair."  
  
"Sounds pretty great to me."  
  
"Yeah, I wouldn't mind that."  
  
"We've come a long way in five years, Danno. You're actually willing to marry me on the beach? Do we have to wear dress shoes for this?"  
  
"The very fact you'd offer to do that shows that I have managed to drill some vestige of civilization into that Neanderthal head of yours."  
  
"It's got nothing to do with being civilized, Danny. It's the culture. The whole island vibe. Dress shoes in the sand...just doesn't make sense."  
  
"It does to me."  
  
"It would," he said, laughing, hugging Danny close, nuzzling his neck.  
  
"Your stomach just growled."  
  
"No, that was me," Steve said, giving Danny a mock growl as he sucked on his neck.  
  
"The first one was a lot lower, so unless your dick growls, too, it was your stomach," he insisted, laughing.  
  
"I'm getting pretty hungry," he said, not releasing Danny even a bit, burying his nose in Danny's hair. "Not ready to let go of you yet."  
  
"I was only thinking about going to the kitchen, not back to New Jersey."  
  
"If you go back to New Jersey, I'll move there, too. And stalk you."  
  
"Stalk me, huh?"  
  
"Relentlessly."  
  
"You're never gonna have to look far to find me, babe. I love you, remember? Never gonna leave you."  
  
"How about if I make you breakfast? Wait on you?"  
  
"How about if we take a shower together and go out for breakfast? Let somebody else wait on both of us while we stare at each other like saps and hold hands?"  
  
"Or we could get breakfast at Rainbow and eat in the truck. Then if we wanna make out..."  
  
"All we have to do is set our boxes on the floor and go for it."  
  
"We have a plan."  
  
"See, breakfast at Rainbow can be romantic," Steve said.  
  
"Anything's romantic when you do it with the right person," Danny said, kissing Steve. "We'll try going to the grocery store and see if the theory holds."  
  
"The grocery store can be romantic," Steve said. "Shopping for a romantic dinner for two."  
  
"Loitering in the lube and condoms aisle," Danny added, nibbing at Steve's ear.  
  
"Just watching you because you make me crazy..."  
  
"Likewise, handsome," he joked, tweaking Steve's nose.  
  
********  
  
Danny was in a great mood when they arrived at the office. In the few weeks since he and Steve made love  _like that_  for the first time, to say their sex lives had taken an upturn was an understatement. It wasn't that they even had to do that to have a good time, but it was as if everything else was easier now. Danny figured a lot of it had to do with the fact that Steve wasn't walking on eggshells around him all the time, scared that he was going to do something, touch something, or say something that would freak Danny out or remind him.   
  
He certainly hadn’t forgotten about it or magically healed overnight. He still had a nightmare now and then, and he hadn't really gotten to the point of being able to do it face down. He didn't even want to do it to Steve with him face down, even though Steve was agreeable to trying it most anywhere in most any position. Nobody could accuse Steve of being set in his ways or the least bit cold when it came to sex.  
  
That weekend, they were going to do a very casual ceremony on the beach to exchange the traditional vows, and rings. Just their friends, some good food from Kamekona, and Grace, Kono, and Chin as their wedding party. Steve was about as happy as he could be with the wedding plans when Danny agreed to t-shirts, shorts, and flip flops. All he cared about was having Steve there to marry him, so what they wore didn't matter. After everything they'd gone through to get where they were, they'd earned the right to do it their way. Besides, if things went well, he'd be undressing Steve anyway within a few hours of the ceremony.   
  
He opened his e-mail as Steve settled in his own office, and froze when he saw an e-mail indicating there was new information in his medical file. He'd had his three-month HIV test, and those results had to be the new information. He looked across the suite at Steve, more like stared him down, until he looked up. Steve looked concerned, got up and came over to his office.  
  
"What's up?"   
  
"I think the test results are in."  
  
"There's no reason to think they won't be good ones, Danno. You ready to check it out?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm ready to be done with this, at least in some way. Not sure I'm ready if they're positive."  
  
"Even if they are, we'll take it on together, okay?"  
  
"I know." Danny took a deep breath and clicked on the link and then logged in to his account. "That's what it is."  
  
"It's gonna be good, sweetheart. Click it."  
  
Danny nodded and clicked the link, holding his breath. The HIV test was negative. He let out a little laugh when he saw the results, and Steve, who was leaning over him from behind, stood up straight and raising both fists a bit let out a "yes!" that made Danny jump a bit. Kono looked in the door, smiling.  
  
"You two hit the lottery?" she asked. Danny stood and Steve pulled him into a hug. Danny closed his eyes and just held on, knowing he was crying and not caring.  
  
"Ten times better than that, Kono," he said. "Money couldn't buy this one."   
  
"Whatever it is, I'm glad for you," she said, smiling at them and closing the door on the way out.   
  
"Danno," Steve muttered, having trouble not losing it himself. His greatest fear was losing Danny and the worst thing he could picture was losing him too young.   
  
"It's okay, babe. I'm okay."  
  
"You're more than okay, sweetheart. Love you," he whispered in Danny's ear.   
  
"You better. You're gonna be married to me for a long time, so it's gonna suck for you if you don't."  
  
"I can't wait to spend a long time married to you," Steve replied, but he didn't let go. Danny relaxed and enjoyed the hug. It was okay with him if Steve never let go.  
  
********  
  
Everything about their wedding was relaxed, casual, and laid back. Kamekona was already grilling up close to the house, guests were gathering in their comfortable clothes and sandals. Grace and Kono were in Grace's room getting ready, since they were doing up their hair and putting flowers in it, just as Danny had predicted.   
  
Steve got some strange looks when he guided the small group of musicians to the spot near where he and Danny were going to tie the knot. He had a little surprise for Danny, and he hoped he liked it. To do it right, he needed a keyboardist, a violinist, a guitarist, a bass player, a drummer, and even a flutist. The hardest part had been finding the time to work with the arranger and the additional musicians until everything sounded the way he wanted it to. He had no experience with arranging and even less with conducting or advising other musicians on how to play their instruments, but he knew the sound he wanted, and this was too important not to get it right.  
  
"You got a band? Why is this the first time I'm finding out about this?" Danny asked, approaching him. Steve stopped what he was doing and stared at Danny. He was wearing a pair of khaki shorts that went a bit past his knees, sandals, and a pale blue shirt not tucked in, sleeves rolled up, the first few buttons open. It was a breezy day and his blond hair was moving a little with the light wind. "What?"  
  
"Wow."  
  
"What?"   
  
"Just...wow," Steve said, touching Danny's cheek, leaning in for a kiss.   
  
"Are you supposed to do that now or is it bad luck?"  
  
"Feels like good luck to me."  
  
"Yeah, it does, doesn't it?" Danny agreed, tugging on the collar of Steve's white shirt. It was a casual shirt, not tucked in either, paired up with jeans he'd rolled up at the bottom. "This is a good look for you, babe," Danny said, running a finger inside the open collar of Steve's shirt, down to the first closed button. "No t-shirt. I like it."  
  
"Figured it would save us time later."  
  
"I see," Danny said, grinning. "So what does that mean about the jeans?"  
  
"You're familiar with the term 'going commando'?"  
  
"Fuck, Steve, you're killing me," he said, letting his forehead drop on Steve's chest. Steve rested a hand on the back of Danny's neck and laughed. "I still want to know what's with the band."  
  
"Just didn't seem like plugging an iPod into a speaker was quite good enough for the occasion."  
  
"That's nice," Danny said, kissing Steve again. "I love you, y'know?"  
  
"Yeah, I know," Steve said, keeping his arms loosely around Danny. "I'm sorta fond of you, too," he said, smiling, kissing the end of Danny's nose.  
  
"Your aim's that bad? C'mere, hot lips," he pulled Steve closer and kissed him properly, with lots of tongue. "You gonna marry me or not?"  
  
"Oh, right, that's what we were supposed to be doing today."  
  
"I still believe our first vows were the ones that mattered. This is just kind of a nice party for Gracie and our friends."  
  
"Me, too. But I don't mind marrying you again. As many times as it takes."  
  
"Let's go do this. I'm starved and whatever Kamekona's grilling smells really good."  
  
"You want to hurry up and get married so we can eat?" Steve asked.  
  
"Yeah. You got a problem with that?"  
  
"No, I was just going to say that it's official now...that I  _am_  the luckiest man on earth."  
  
********  
  
Before they said their vows, the small band played an instrumental version of  _Annie's Song_  for Kono, Grace, Chin, Danny and Steve to walk up to the spot where the minister was standing. Holding each other's hands, they took turns saying the traditional vows, and Danny found he was glad they did. It wasn’t that he needed this to feel committed to Steve - their private promises and the legal paperwork covered all that - but saying it in front of their friends and family with a minister presiding was meaningful. And it made Grace happy, which was all Danny needed as motivation to do most anything.   
  
There was a light breeze and it wasn’t terribly hot. Steve looked gorgeous and uncharacteristically carefree in his white shirt and rolled up jeans. Sometimes looking at him made Danny’s breath catch in his throat a bit. It wasn’t just his looks, but it was the way he looked at Danny, the gentle way he touched him... Without the overdone suits and all the formal arrangements, it was just the two of them committing their lives to each other and having a party with their friends.   
  
When it came time to exchange rings, Chin handed Steve Danny’s ring, and Steve paused before taking Danny’s hand to put it on his finger.   
  
“We agreed to have something engraved on each other’s rings. I really tried to think of something that would express even a little bit of what you mean to me, Danny, and this seemed like the right thing.” He held the ring out toward Danny to take it and look at the engraving. Danny laughed out loud, and Steve was right, it was perfect.   
  
“Book Me, Danno,” he read aloud, still laughing, handing Steve the ring back. Steve took his hand, not waiting for the minister to give him a script for what to say.   
  
“I love you, Danny. I don’t ever want to lose you, because if I lost you, I’d lose me, too.” Steve slid the ring on his finger. “With this ring, I thee wed,” he said.   
  
Danny was pretty choked up at those words, especially coming from Steve who wasn’t given to wearing his heart on his sleeve or professing his innermost feelings in front of a crowd. Grace handed Danny Steve’s ring.   
  
“It took me a while to find the right thing. I wanted something in Hawaiian because anyplace that is the reason that I found you just kind of shoots to the top of my list of favorite places to be. I can translate if you need me to, but you probably know what it means. Besides being able to save the world on a regular basis, you also speak about twelve different languages, right?”  
  
“Only pieces of eight or nine, probably,” Steve said, laughing, taking the ring so he could read the inscription. He stared at it a moment and Danny could see his chin quiver a bit before he spoke. “Nalowale Mahele,” he read, blinking. “Missing Piece,” he added, his voice barely audible.   
  
Danny took the ring back. “When you picked out these rings, I didn’t get it. But you made me see the meaning in them and once I did, I couldn’t think of having anything else but these, because you’re the missing piece of me, too, Steven. Whenever you look at that ring, I just want you to remember that I hear you, and I get you. The way you get me. And the way you are...is just perfect because if you changed, we wouldn’t fit together like this.” The minister prompted Danny for the final words. “Oh, yeah, sorry,” he said, smiling at Steve. “With this ring, I thee wed,” he said, sliding it on Steve’s finger.   
  
********  
  
When it was time for their first dance, Danny recognized the melody the band was playing.   
  
“That’s your song...the one you wrote,” Danny said, as they started swaying together to the music.   
  
“It’s your song now, Danny. I finally figured out a title, and I decided some things didn’t need words.”  
  
“Like us,” Danny said, settling against Steve, head on his shoulder, arms around him. Steve held him close, and it was more of a slow-moving embrace than a dance. Danny shut out the world until all he heard was the delicate sound of a beautiful piece of music that bore his name. “So it’s just called ‘Danny’?”  
  
“Yeah,” Steve agreed. He put his hand lightly on the back of Danny’s head and rested his cheek against Danny’s hair. “Only word I need.”  
  
There was something joyful in the song, even though there were no words. It was in the flow of the melody, the strains of the flute, the gentle notes of the guitar.   
  
“It’s beautiful,” he said. “You’re really talented, Steve. How’d you get it all together with all the instruments and--”  
  
“Found some people who know what they’re doing with arranging, and just listened until it sounded like the way you make me feel.”  
  
“I make you feel like that?” Danny asked, pulling back to look into Steve’s eyes.  
  
“Yeah, you do.”  
  
“I’m pretty amazing, huh?”   
  
“I guess I should have called it ‘The Amazing Danno.’”  
  
“Great. Now I sound like a bad lounge act.”  
  
“Should’ve quit while you were ahead, sweetheart,” Steve said, chuckling.   
  
“I’m still ahead. I got you, babe.”  
  
“There’s a song by that name, isn’t there?” Steve joked, kissing Danny’s cheek.   
  
"Who am I? Your Grandma? Bring that mouth over here, Steven," Danny said, guiding Steve's chin to the right position and starting a kiss that was so passionate, so long, and so intense that it had the rest of the wedding guests cheering.


End file.
